32. Philadelphia Flyers 1.7
Last season: 75.3 ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓
We’re just going to go through some of the best negative responses here. There were almost 600 of them. I think two “optimists” left actual comments. Apologies to them, but there’s no point. Also, a couple people wrote poems.
• Be serious.
• I have never been less optimistic for any team across any sport ever.
• I don’t have all day to write a novel about all of the reasons why I’m dreading this season, but a lot of them are subheadings of the broader topic “Chuck Fletcher has destroyed this franchise and is somehow still on their payroll.”
• I’d be more hopeful if I was watching a planet-killer asteroid hurtling towards me.
• I hate the Flyers and the Flyers hate me.
• I’m expecting an arch reading “Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here” being installed in front of the Wells Fargo Center this season.